Final Project Critique

Jackie

adjust second gesture ("jobs") - does not read as well as the first ("food")
Maybe try a downwards moving gesture (hand drop?)

140-150 - knee wobble
175-185 - lose foot shift
Heads are falling off
- lessen spine bend
- left arm in air - find a really good pose, try not to twin too badly
- improve finger poses - angular and mad!
Head are falling off anticpation - try hands on head, state of shock look on face
Make sure you have good contrast between "our pets" and "heads are falling off" - think explosion of anger




Taki

Walk -

contact pose
- rotate hips to assist leg rotation - hips are rotated wrong way
- counter-twist spine to compensate and keep head point forward
- make sure contact foot is hitting the ground
- back knee is turned too inwards


Passing position
- root of character should shift in X so center of grav is over supporting leg
- root should rotate in Z to show the weight being on one foot
- spine should counter rotate to compensate for hips
- head counter rotates- keep head level from front view
- figure out arm rotation from front - outwards curve is more feminine, inwards more masculine
- foot needs subtle rotation and translation in X to give it more character
- remove toe roll and rotate foot forward instead - toe roll should be only when foot is about to leave ground

Motion -

-Adjust Y curve of root - smooth it out - high on passing, low on contact, don't crouch him too low on contact

-Head needs subtle overlap and drag
-Flatten foot sooner after contact pose
-Google "Keith Lango + Power Centers" and think about how to incorp. that into your walk
-Lean root fwd more
-animate the wrists
-animate the fingers
- animate the root moving forward and backward in Z to help complement the force of the walk.

Run -

Same notes on hips and spine for walk - twist, contraposto, etc

conact-

passing-
-root too low
-leg too crumpled
- supporting knee should be straighter and more to the front


- make sure head overlaps spine
- try to keep head centered from front
- get root moving forward on Z
- exxagerate hip bounce in Y, while keeping upper spine stable
- cleanup spine and root curves - make sure the motion is smooth
- frame 4 - both ankles broken
- from front view, knees go all over






Paul

- right hand cleanup - needs drag and overlap
- frame 50-70 - make paper read motion smoother - blend arm, elbow and wrist motions better
- eye look needs work on 60 - 90 - too locked in place. Maybe try keeping them on Kevin Spacey
- get hips slightly more invested in the lean to side gesture - too locked right now
-frame 35 - support wrist rotation with a bit of elbow rotation
-last digit of pinky is too crumpled/curled
-15-25 - finger uncurl could be smoother
- "practice" needs work - mouth wider on "pra"
- "Hadn't had the practice" should be smoother - 3 mouth opens
- subtle spine lean support on "practice"
- try adding some subtle Y rot on head
- try imrpoving arcs in head
- right arm seems totally locked on turn
- add subtle Y tran on root to help sell existing up/down arcs


Rais

- start - bend right arm/elbow lower to complement existing line of action
- rotate right wrist outwards (subtle) to help with line of action as well
- 95 - finger is going through head
- anticipate "why" with lips more by getting them pursed a bit sooner
- 93 - head is too leaned to side
- 103-107 - right wrist translation seems locked, maybe have him stretch the wrist fwd a bit more
115-140 - left wrist needs work - fingers should relax/curl sooner
120-140 - blend all left wrist rotation axis better
90 - eyeballs seem to be in weird postion - maybe fix head first to fix this
-180 - spine/shoulders should twist to complement slap gesture
-the flop @ end needs work - more curl and overlap in spine, possibly straighten the spine at the end of the slap and use existing curve value for drag here
- lose pursed lips @ end of "right", maybe try holding the end syllable instead
-105-140 -right arm drop should be more simple - find a better arc, quick drop motion
- finger pose on "fired" could be more interesting - think angry!
- blend wrist slap rotation into end of wrist slap translation better.
- "You Know What?" is all about a quick, asserive transition from the point gesture to him standing upright. Quick, snappy.
- frame 1 left elbow pop.
-0-110 - left fingers are swimming and thumb goes thru desk in first 80 frames


Yalda -

34 - sell "buring you" with rest of body more, otherwise wrist position @ 34 looks odd
0-40 - left hand is floaty on shovel - lock it more
65- remove double shover tap, just sell the single shovel dump and let the dirt do the work.
100-108 - get the line of action in the shovel to rotate more into the action
115 - left elbow pop
"Shut Up" needs more work on overlap on spine, head, and shovel
210 - rotate hips more into shovel swing
38 - maybe try rotating shovel so line of action is a bit more upwards
90-100 - lose eye look back down @ grave, extend eye roll instead
40-56 - eyes stare straight ahead, maybe have them glance down @ grave sooner?
shovel floaty at the end
support end surprised gestures with spine a bit more
90-120 - hips do weird wiggles - simplfy anim to support weight transition
207- spine is too bend @ top
176- rotate shovel (actual geometry, not circle) to dump dirt and ease tension on wrists


Jesse

50 - wrist and mike should roll outwards more for overlap
1280- check right clav - too high?
1415-1450 - try adding subtle horizontal head arc (arcs?) during head rise
1605ish - left foot should stay longer OR hips should move over sooner - right now, off balance
1469 - need to show "T" and end of "Night"
1415-1475 - left wrist cleanup, overlap/offset fingers on close and open, remove unneeded finger/wrist rotation
1490-1570 - improve arc on root throughout motion
1535 - she bonks herself on the head w mike - cleanup motion
1495ish - improve arc on mike hand
880ish - head pop up is abrupt, smooth out
fade out/trail audio a bit at end

Final Project 3 feedback

Paul

look @ notes in email
Lip Synch - Nice! Looks like a great first pass. We'll talk about this part on Thurs.
Left Arm 50-end needs loosening, overlap, etc
right hand better finger pose for paper hold

Rais
0-1 seconds
fix hand pose - too distracting / needs to be more natural
fix left elbow to emphasize line of action better

1 sec - 4 sec
Needs cleanup
Too much is happening - simplify the gestures here
"one thing right" - try to hit 2 of the 3 beats here (3 seconds)
Right wrist is broken, too floaty/wobbly
elbow is wobbly/poppy

5 seconds - you know what?
needs subtle anticipation and better slow out - use the dialogue for timing
find a better line of action here
right wrist broken during transition

You're fired!
support action with upper body twist/lean
support with root as well
try shifting weight during slap/ side to side
Better flop in chair, make motion quicker with better/longer slow out and better flop @ end


Yalda

start (1-3 sec)
1st footstep- char is off balance
tosro movement needs smoothing
better shovel anticipation - better first shovel pose

"I'm burying you" needs head/torso gesture - listen to sound and use motion to sell it.

First dirt dump into ground - add a dip in the shovel and root movement, support gesture more w spine

mid-section bwtn 1st shovel and 2nd shovel - simplify this, have him hold pose, do head/eye action, then go to 2nd shovel anticipation


Jesse
start
left hand fingers - simplyify - start w good curl, open @ halfway, end with curl/clench/fist. This
of her squeezing the word
try moving whole character keys forward a few frames (4-10) on "night" and "holy"
0-2 seconds - left wrist rotate is too stiff
Holy - find better arc in torso
Lip synch needs mouth widen and purse to overlap jaw
2nd hip shift at end wake up step seems to forced and strong


Greg
frame68 eye weirdness
couple more frames @ end for settle
60-70 right arm/elbow more sticky, less pop up
push nervous face on bleed
more overlap and animation on lip/wide-purse control